Domestic Blindness

At one stage I had three grown men living in my house. It meant that I was continually finding “MISSING” things. Me. The only adult female. Why is this?

Nobody could ever find their socks, shirt, t-shirt, sunglasses or any specific item of clothing. A friend of mine calls it “Man Looking” versus “Mom Looking”.




Otherwise known as “can’t remember shit”

I’ve done pretty exhaustive research among my friends and acquaintances and to varying degrees it appears that ALL CHILDREN have it. All of them. Happily, girls grow out of it, Disturbingly, most males never do. 

Common examples of objects that sufferers “Can’t See For Looking” include:

  • socks
  • underwear
  • their favourite item of clothing
  • bottle opener, and any other kitchen gadget
  • butter – or anything in the fridge
  • tape
  • keys (usually to be found exactly where THEY left them

 I’ve got a cupboard in my kitchen where I keep vitamins, Advil, bandaids – that kind of thing. It’s also the cupboard that everyone just fucks stuff into. Every home has one of “those” drawers or cupboards. I was tidying and organizing when I discovered a bottle of pills that I swear I had never seen before. Ironically, they were called REMEMBER – FX

I asked everyone in the house if they knew how they got there. No one could REMEMBER seeing them. No one could REMEMBER buying them.

One of the things that I pride myself  on is my memory.

I admit that from time to time I forget why I went upstairs, so I have to go back downstairs to retrace my steps in order to remember. I always write a shopping list, but I never remember to take it with me.

And yeah, every once in a while I come home from the supermarket with a whole trunk-load of stuff that I kind of needed and yet forgot to get the dish washer pods that I went there to get in the first place.

I can never find my glasses….

I will even confess to having forgotten the occasional anniversary or birthday. Ok, my first TWO wedding anniversaries. [We were busy]

Sure as hell I would have remembered going to the drug store to buy some MEMORY pills!

I asked again…’Where the bleep did these Memory Pills come from?’. I was met with blank stares. 

I had no intention of taking these pills, however I did want to know how they magicked their way into my “medicine cabinet”

I resorted to my best friend Google.

I searched for ‘Remember-FX’ and GAH!!!

I got the flippin things FREE at Costco so I had seen them before. SIGH.

Maybe I need to take those pills after all...

Now, what was I doing?

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